technically speaking
breathe in, breathe out........ breathe in, breathe out.......
So, I am fully aware that it is 11:51 p.m. but it is technically still June 1st so I beat the deadline (well, when I started typing it was 11:51 but my OCD does kick in so I type, delete, type, delete....well, you get the picture.
Pretty standard day first of the day......
Morning mayhem begins at 5:45 when Elijah (now 2 years old) comes to meet me at the top of the stairs rubbing his eyes declaring how he was wearing big boy pajamas and slept in his big kid bed. I do have to admit, I am a proud momma that he has reaching this milestone- however, his proud declaration created the flow of waking children which finally ended 6:00 a.m. .......at which point everyone was begging for breakfast because they were starving after not eating for 9 hours during the night (yes, one ultra long run on sentence but give me a break- it is 11:55 at this point). By 7:00 a.m. Brasen was needing his medication (very strict 12 hour schedule with his anti rejection medication) and also needed to be cathed (something we have to do through a small hole in his tummy every morning and every evening) before he could get on with the extremely important game of basketball he had paused on the Xbox the previous day. At this point Alex was just happy to be with her momma in the kitchen coloring with a strange color of marker while I attempted to clean up the breakfast buffet that had closed only moments before. This was a struggle because Elijah is an eater and if he catches a glimpse of an un-eaten banana on someone's plate he charges at it and if you get in his way- you may loose a limb.
Today was an extra special day because our kids had it all planned out- they would assist me in the kitchen most of the morning preparing drinks and food for the backyard worship event we were hosting later in the day. Alex was also ready to finally clean her room- this should be written down in the history books or something- so she wanted to get all dressed up to do so (a girl has to have sparkled bangles on while picking up barbies 5,000th pair of shoes off the floor)! And last but certainly not least- Brasen was going to attempt to ride his bike without training wheels!! I know you may be thinking "he's 7! Why is he still using training wheels!!!!" Well, Brasen's balance is terrible at best and he still has skeletal and muscular differences than other kids that has kept him from having this monumental moment most children experience much earlier in life.
All of the excitement of the "party day" as Alex so excitedly referred to it, mixed with the OCD behaviors I exhibit blended in with the standard sterilization of ordinary things for Brasen makes for a very crazy and hectic day... and sometimes this mommy finds herself saying things to my children that sound like this..."are you bleeding? are you throwing up? did someone say a terrible nasty word that needs extra attention? if the answer is no then go take care of the problem yourself because you will have to do that later in life- for the rest of your life." while my stud of a husband looks at me laughing (where the kids cannot see him) and says "that is something very weird yet very profound that you just told our young children..." That's me but little does he know how I am agonizing on the inside wondering if what I just said was going to cause them to make poor life choices or if Brasen was growing a virus inside of his body that would cause him to become sick overnight and end us up in the ER later the next day (these are things I talk to God about daily- trust me, it is a faith walk!)
Rewind 9 years...... when Brian and I got married we went to work for mega church in OKC. When you were hired as staff at this church they required you to take a D.I.S.C personality test to help them understand how to deal with you as a staff member. My personality was so far "I" that I barely had anything else- that means I was so outgoing and people oriented that I probably couldn't organize a sock drawer! Back to present day- at the church which I currently attend and work part time at- we are working on learning about our personalities. My my my how the years can change your personality. After 9.5 years of marriage, 3 children, 1 kidney transplant and a heck of a lot of major bumps in the road your weaker personalities start to rise up and you become extremely well rounded.
I tell you all of this because it helps explain my day a little bit better (although it has added an extra paragraph or two to this entry:~) I have to come to grips with who I am as a person everyday. Who I am as a mom, wife, worship pastor, daughter, friend- you name it, I wear several hats just like everyone else I know. There is a part of me today that looks at the big picture of a day and says "this is going to take too much effort and cause too much trouble for you so don't do it!!!" but there is an even bigger part of me that is my "I" personality (which is still the strongest one by the way) that screams "I need to be around people and I need to have fun and I need to laugh and eat junk food!!!!" The first one thinks about all of the germs I am exposing my home to which in turns could cause problems for Brasen but then there is the other that helps me to see the joy in my children's eyes when they get to run around and play with their friends in the backyard and drink lemonade and eat s'mores and sing songs and, most importantly- MOST IMPORTANTLY- when they see their mommy and daddy doing exactly what God wants them to do..... loving each other, loving their babies and loving others while sharing our home and heart for Christ with our family, friends and complete strangers.
Tonight we had around 30 people in our backyard singing songs of worship, eating junk food, drinking summertime favorites (lemonade and sweet tea people!) and listening to the kids shrieking with shear joy in the background as they fought a good fight as darth vadar and all the other starwars creatures I cannot spell:) Precious memories~
I am convinced that God did not put Brian and I together in this crazy marriage to sit quietly in our disinfected home eating brown rice and veggies for the rest of our lives while our kids look out the window and wonder what the world is really like. He gave each of our children a zeal and a passion for life that I rarely see. He gave each of them a heart for people~ our kids LOVE people....they just do. It is part of their inner being and I know that God is going to use that in an explosive way someday.
Psalm 18:32 says "It is God who arms me with strength and makes my way perfect!"
He gives me the strength to do my days with pride so, what else should I do but live them out!! What does this mean for an OCD, germaphobe transplant mom of three kids? It means late nights cleaning and sanitizing after we have had a wonderful evening making beautiful memories with some incredible friends. Memories my children will have forever- I simply pray that they will someday choose to make these memories with their families.....even if it isn't always the easiest thing to do at the time.
So, now it is 12:37 a.m. June 2nd. Elijah just fell out of bed and Brian will be riding over 70 miles today raising money and awareness for MS on the Tour de Cure. I just finished sanitizing our house and in approximately 4 short hours Elijah will be waking up wanting his first banana of the day- at that time I will remember Isaiah 40:29: "He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak..."
Press on because there are memories to be made..... God is good.
So, I am fully aware that it is 11:51 p.m. but it is technically still June 1st so I beat the deadline (well, when I started typing it was 11:51 but my OCD does kick in so I type, delete, type, delete....well, you get the picture.
Pretty standard day first of the day......
Morning mayhem begins at 5:45 when Elijah (now 2 years old) comes to meet me at the top of the stairs rubbing his eyes declaring how he was wearing big boy pajamas and slept in his big kid bed. I do have to admit, I am a proud momma that he has reaching this milestone- however, his proud declaration created the flow of waking children which finally ended 6:00 a.m. .......at which point everyone was begging for breakfast because they were starving after not eating for 9 hours during the night (yes, one ultra long run on sentence but give me a break- it is 11:55 at this point). By 7:00 a.m. Brasen was needing his medication (very strict 12 hour schedule with his anti rejection medication) and also needed to be cathed (something we have to do through a small hole in his tummy every morning and every evening) before he could get on with the extremely important game of basketball he had paused on the Xbox the previous day. At this point Alex was just happy to be with her momma in the kitchen coloring with a strange color of marker while I attempted to clean up the breakfast buffet that had closed only moments before. This was a struggle because Elijah is an eater and if he catches a glimpse of an un-eaten banana on someone's plate he charges at it and if you get in his way- you may loose a limb.
Today was an extra special day because our kids had it all planned out- they would assist me in the kitchen most of the morning preparing drinks and food for the backyard worship event we were hosting later in the day. Alex was also ready to finally clean her room- this should be written down in the history books or something- so she wanted to get all dressed up to do so (a girl has to have sparkled bangles on while picking up barbies 5,000th pair of shoes off the floor)! And last but certainly not least- Brasen was going to attempt to ride his bike without training wheels!! I know you may be thinking "he's 7! Why is he still using training wheels!!!!" Well, Brasen's balance is terrible at best and he still has skeletal and muscular differences than other kids that has kept him from having this monumental moment most children experience much earlier in life.
All of the excitement of the "party day" as Alex so excitedly referred to it, mixed with the OCD behaviors I exhibit blended in with the standard sterilization of ordinary things for Brasen makes for a very crazy and hectic day... and sometimes this mommy finds herself saying things to my children that sound like this..."are you bleeding? are you throwing up? did someone say a terrible nasty word that needs extra attention? if the answer is no then go take care of the problem yourself because you will have to do that later in life- for the rest of your life." while my stud of a husband looks at me laughing (where the kids cannot see him) and says "that is something very weird yet very profound that you just told our young children..." That's me but little does he know how I am agonizing on the inside wondering if what I just said was going to cause them to make poor life choices or if Brasen was growing a virus inside of his body that would cause him to become sick overnight and end us up in the ER later the next day (these are things I talk to God about daily- trust me, it is a faith walk!)
Rewind 9 years...... when Brian and I got married we went to work for mega church in OKC. When you were hired as staff at this church they required you to take a D.I.S.C personality test to help them understand how to deal with you as a staff member. My personality was so far "I" that I barely had anything else- that means I was so outgoing and people oriented that I probably couldn't organize a sock drawer! Back to present day- at the church which I currently attend and work part time at- we are working on learning about our personalities. My my my how the years can change your personality. After 9.5 years of marriage, 3 children, 1 kidney transplant and a heck of a lot of major bumps in the road your weaker personalities start to rise up and you become extremely well rounded.
I tell you all of this because it helps explain my day a little bit better (although it has added an extra paragraph or two to this entry:~) I have to come to grips with who I am as a person everyday. Who I am as a mom, wife, worship pastor, daughter, friend- you name it, I wear several hats just like everyone else I know. There is a part of me today that looks at the big picture of a day and says "this is going to take too much effort and cause too much trouble for you so don't do it!!!" but there is an even bigger part of me that is my "I" personality (which is still the strongest one by the way) that screams "I need to be around people and I need to have fun and I need to laugh and eat junk food!!!!" The first one thinks about all of the germs I am exposing my home to which in turns could cause problems for Brasen but then there is the other that helps me to see the joy in my children's eyes when they get to run around and play with their friends in the backyard and drink lemonade and eat s'mores and sing songs and, most importantly- MOST IMPORTANTLY- when they see their mommy and daddy doing exactly what God wants them to do..... loving each other, loving their babies and loving others while sharing our home and heart for Christ with our family, friends and complete strangers.
Tonight we had around 30 people in our backyard singing songs of worship, eating junk food, drinking summertime favorites (lemonade and sweet tea people!) and listening to the kids shrieking with shear joy in the background as they fought a good fight as darth vadar and all the other starwars creatures I cannot spell:) Precious memories~
I am convinced that God did not put Brian and I together in this crazy marriage to sit quietly in our disinfected home eating brown rice and veggies for the rest of our lives while our kids look out the window and wonder what the world is really like. He gave each of our children a zeal and a passion for life that I rarely see. He gave each of them a heart for people~ our kids LOVE people....they just do. It is part of their inner being and I know that God is going to use that in an explosive way someday.
Psalm 18:32 says "It is God who arms me with strength and makes my way perfect!"
He gives me the strength to do my days with pride so, what else should I do but live them out!! What does this mean for an OCD, germaphobe transplant mom of three kids? It means late nights cleaning and sanitizing after we have had a wonderful evening making beautiful memories with some incredible friends. Memories my children will have forever- I simply pray that they will someday choose to make these memories with their families.....even if it isn't always the easiest thing to do at the time.
So, now it is 12:37 a.m. June 2nd. Elijah just fell out of bed and Brian will be riding over 70 miles today raising money and awareness for MS on the Tour de Cure. I just finished sanitizing our house and in approximately 4 short hours Elijah will be waking up wanting his first banana of the day- at that time I will remember Isaiah 40:29: "He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak..."
Press on because there are memories to be made..... God is good.
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